I Feel The Urge To Create A D&D Campaign With A Lesbian Vampire Who Realised It At 144 Years Because

Campaign Idea:

Journey (yeah it’s bland, but I preferred a simple one for this)

Plot: A group of friends decide to begin a journey around the world to see things that they only read in books or heard the adventurers talk about: the ocean, seas, mountains, snow, goblins, dragons, etc etc. just to fulfil their curiosity

Tip: Add things that the character believe real like the others but actually are just lies that the adventurers or adults told them and they still believe them. Maybe because they’re a bit gullible (for a barbarian to add a little spice to the simple “barbarian=stupid” thing) or maybe because they actually made a list of all the things they want to see and selected, wrongly, those who they have doubts that exist (wizard), etc etc

Inspiration: From this awesome thread above (thanks to @tolkien-fantasy and @lord-westley)

I love hearing stories of people who have never seen snow or mountains. I personally have never seen the ocean before, I've never even been outside the US, but I still can't imagine life without the mountains outside my window or snow on the ground. I just feel the need to share these things with people who have never seen them, just like I've never seen the ocean. How two members of a single species can live completely different lives is something so special to me

So here's some mountains for those who have never been :)

I can hear Geese outside too haha

Bread Idea

Breadionary

Description: a spell that grants you the ability to summon from thin air the perfect type of bread for your needs.

Functionality: Once casted you receive one of these types of bread (at your choice)

• Baguette: Hard crust, light and airy inside, slightly nutty flavor. +2 Animal Handling

• Brioche: Soft and fluffy, slightly sweet and buttery. +2 Nature

• Ciabatta: Hard crust, chewy inside, mild sour flavor. +2 Sleight of Hand

• Focaccia: Soft and oily, herby and savory flavor. +2 Medicine

• Sourdough: Hard crust, chewy and dense, tangy flavor. +2 Intimidation

• Pita: Soft and pocketed, neutral and slightly chewy. +2 Arcana

• Naan: Soft and pillowy, buttery and slightly tangy. +2 History

• Rye: Dense and firm, earthy and slightly sour flavor. +2 Survival

• Challah: Soft and slightly chewy, mildly sweet and eggy. +2 Stealth

• Multigrain: Firm crust, grainy texture, nutty and wholesome flavor. +2 Acrobatics

• Cornbread: Soft and crumbly, sweet and corn-forward flavor. +2 Athletics

• Bagel: Chewy crust and inside, mildly sweet and malty flavor. +2 Investigation

• English Muffin: Soft with a crisp outside when toasted, mildly tangy flavor. +2 Perfomance

• Panettone: Soft and airy, sweet with hints of citrus and dried fruit. +2 Religion

• Lavash: Thin and soft, slightly chewy and neutral flavor. +2 Insight

• Pretzel Bread: Firm crust with soft inside, salty and malty flavor. +2 Deception

• Injera: Spongy and soft, tangy and fermented flavor. + 2 Perception

• Zopf: Soft and braided, slightly sweet and eggy flavor. + 2 Persuasion.

The caster can also choose to roll 1d4:

The bonus becomes -2 instead

The bonus stays the same

The bonus stays the same

The bonus becomes +4

At level 10: the d4 changes to a d6 with similar effects

The bonus becomes -6

The bonus becomes -4

The bonus becomes -2

The bonus stays the same

The bonus becomes +4

The bonus becomes +6

(Note: when the bonus turns into a negative number the taste is still perfect and the bread still feel like the perfect snack for the occasion, only after the 10 minutes the taste will resurface as horrible causing the player to vomit profusely and gain +1 Exhaustion Point)

Inspiration: BREAD DAYYY

Item Idea

Shoulder Saddle

Description: a leather seat that is attached to the one of the pauldrons of a medium size or + character’s Armor. It can be used by small characters to short rest while the rest of the party moves, to comfortably sit while travelling, to pat your big companion or be patted by your big companion. The benefits for the characters will apply only if their size is the same as the model of the Saddle they bought intended:

5 sp) Medium X Small

2 sp) Medium X Tiny

10 sp) Large X Small

8 sp) Large X Tiny

Bonus! 23 sp) Large X Medium

Bonus! 2 sp) Small X Tiny

Functionality: (Along with the obvious ones like immunity to fall damage for the smaller character or the inability to move during their turns, etc etc)

The Shoulder Saddle gives +1 to the AC of the bigger character, +1 to the smaller character’s perception checks involving sight, +2 charisma to both. Disadvantage with short range attacks and advantage with long ranged attacks to the smaller character, inverted for the bigger character.

Their turns will fuse into one during fights (using the bigger characters DEX for initiative +1), if in a round the big character stays still while the small one attacks with a ranged attack/weapon and it hits, roll 1d6, add that to the total damage AFTER any deduction of any kind that will affect the damage.

To be clear, this additional damage can’t be halved, stopped or in any way modified except if the total damage is cancelled, then it will act accordingly, if the total damage is halved by resistance or modified in another manner, the result of the 1d6 won’t be affected and will be added AFTER these calculations.

Inspiration: The image and post above from @billfrancois ❤️ (check out their art, it’s very good)

Best part of playing a smaller race in DnD is that your party members can give you uppies :3c

Spell Idea

RePain

Functionality: Reproduce the last damage that the creature has suffered, it doesn’t function if the last hit failed, didn’t deal damage or was another RePain.

If the last attack required a save throw the creature targeted automatically fails (because it rolls the same number of the last time)

If the last attack was boosted by rage, or other mechanics player-based, the boost still applies. If the boost was due to some magic items that the RePain caster doesn’t have or isn’t affected by, the boost doesn’t applies, but the owner of the item can use a bonus action to throw the item (with advantage) to the RePain caster (the throw can happen on the attacker turn, taking their bonus action, or on the caster’s turn, taking their bonus action even if it’s the attacker who throws the item)

The spell fails if the last attack was 1 hour before the casting of RePain or if the player casting it wasn’t in a 50ft radius of the damage being dealed.

If the amount of damage dealt in the attack was reduced by any item/spell/etc that the enemy used the RePain spell will deal the normal amount of damage.

The RePain spell can’t be redirectionated towards the caster nor the original attacker.

The RePain spell doesn’t heal the player casting it if the original attack counted a heal on the attacker, but it does heal the original attacker by the same amount.

The RePain can be used as a cantrip or as a level 1 spell, when used as a cantrip it cant reproduce the same attack (ex: sword attack by player A, dagger by player B, fireball by player C, Eldritch Blast by player C, etc etc) twice (the OG attacker can be the same tho). When used as a level 1 spell it can, so an Eldritch Blast spammer can be “helped” by a RePain lvl1 spammer.

The RePain spell doesn’t replicate non-damaging spells (Minor Illusion, Charm Person).

If the bonus effect (blind, charmed, paralysed) of the last damage-dealing attack is already gone, the RePain spell reactivates it (if charmed or similar, the target is charmed by the RePain caster)

The RePain takes effect even if the original attacker is dead/unconscious/etc, possibly healing them if the original attack healed them even by just 1 HP.

Inspiration: my mind just birthed it while I was smoking. My brain is a cool dude

What? A non D&D post? Yeah, cause the safety of my non verbal children comes first babeee

Magic Item or Spell

Temporary Sacrifice

Effect: The user use all their magic and put it into an object, losing the ability to use magic in any way, receiving tho a +2 into their stats, +5 to hit, +1d12 to any attack they deal. If they die they loose these bonuses but after 24h from their death they return in a 5ft radius from the object that then retrieves all the magic stored and breaks. If after 24h they aren’t dead yet, they roll a d20, on a Nat20 they get 24h more hours, if they roll anything else they die on the spot and everything returns at normal.

The equipment that the player wore at death is teleported with them, their weapon/s too even if it slipped from their hands at death.

After being teleported the player rolls a [(LevelOfTheCharacter) +3]d4, they lose that amount of Max HP until they have a long rest

Notes: If it’s a spell then the object will be decided by the character, if it’s a magic item then that’s the object where the user magic will be stored.

When the dead return into a 5ft radius from the object, the object breaks only if it was a Magic Item. In case it was a spell, the cool-down is 1 year.

Inspiration: The Viking of Stamford Bridge

Magic Item Idea

Paper Knife

Description: A piece of paper with a drawing of a knife. The piece of paper can’t be burned or destroyed as long as it has charges. Per each charges used, the knife drawn gets more and more covered in blood. Recharges every day.

Functionality: 23/day you can touch the piece of paper and point at an enemy that immediately suffer 1d4 piercing damage, or 1d6 if outside of combat (this action starts combat)

Inspiration: @trilliath’s mom

I was explaining to my mom about how tumblr is excited for the ides of march tomorrow, and celebrating the assassination of a corrupt politician etc. etc. and she goes, "Oh! So what do we wear!"

And I said, "IDK a knife?"

And she said, "Ohh, I don't think I can get away with that at the conference. But I know, I'll draw a picture of a knife and carry it around in my pocket and get a giggle out of it whenever I look in my pocket!"

Anyway my mom's brilliant and I think we should all carry paper knives tomorrow.

Spell Idea

Butterfingers

Description: The target loses the grip of all the things they have in their hands for 1 minute, making them constantly fall on the ground.

Functionality: The caster points with both hands at the target, on a Con fail the target will lose the grip on what they were holding. Every time the target tries to hold something, the object will slip from their hands. If the caster doesn’t use Concentration to maintain the spell it will last for a max of 60 secs during which the target will have one possibility to (with a Con ST) hold one object for one turn (6 secs). If the caster uses Concentration to maintain the spell the spell it will last for a max of 10 mins, without the possibility to hold something for even only one turn. While in this condition the target also can’t cast spells that uses somatic components

Inspiration: I dropped some butter and my mum made a horrible pun about it… thanks mum

Pet Idea

Duck Of Inspiration

Description: An apparently normal duck, occasionally it glows of a very faint yellow light.

Functionality: Give to all the players in a 10ft, that are in good terms with the duck, the possibility to use +1 to +5 inspiration per long rest. A player can use +5 all in one roll, or two players can use +2 and then +3.

BUT

If someone uses the inspiration of the duck they will not be able to use it until the next long rest. If someone uses the inspiration point that the DM gave them and that sums up to more than a +1 inspiration used, they will be unable to use the Duck until the next long rest.

To be in good terms with the duck you need to feed it, play with it, take care of her, NEVER call her “Quack”, “Goose”, “Silly Goose”, “Duck”, “Chicken” or “Bird” and NEVER say to her to shut up or act angrily towards her if she quacks.

If you do one of those things, you roll a d20

15-20: the Duck will look at you angrily, quack loudly while glowing and you will be feeling uneasy for a minute

10-14: the Duck will quack, looking at you seriously while glowing of a faint orange, you’ll be unable to speak for a minute. If you have any inspiration points, you lose 1 of them

5-9: the Duck will quack quietly, looking at you with disdain while glowing orange, you’ll be blinded and mute for a minute. If you have any, you’ll lose 2 inspiration points.

2-4: the Duck looks at you in silence and glows red, you’ll be paralysed for a minute, uneasy for 5 minutes and take 3d4 of psychic damage. You’ll lose all your inspiration points given to you but the DM

1: the Duck eyes turn white, its feathers vibrate while turning of a pitch black, it opens its wings and beak, looking directly into your eyes. The duck glows purple, everything around you seems to tremble like in an earthquake and then you start vomiting blood losing 20 pure damage, you look at the Duck and for a second it seems to have horns and sharpened teeth inside it’s beak, what seems like blood comes down like tears from its eyes. Then everything turns black, and the next thing you realise after opening your eyes, is that you’ve been transformed into a duck (a chicken, if you’ve called her “Chicken”). No other players have seen past the black aura that surrounded the Duck and you while everything happened. Everyone need to roll an Intelligence roll (>5 to succeed) to understand that the Duck polymorphed you into a Duck/Chicken. You lose all your inspiration points and stay polymorphed for 2 hours or until the next rest. You can understand other Ducks while in this form, except The Duck.

Rolling lower than a 12 will make you unable to use the Duck again (don’t say it to your player until it tries to, to make it funnier) because you’ll be in bad terms with the Duck.

Say sorry to the Duck and take care of her and it will accept your apologies and after your next rest you’ll be able to use the Duck again.

Speak with animals will not work (and any other spell that need its target to be an animal) but will give you the faint sensation that you should make this Duck friend and follow you, for your own good.

P.S. Yes, The Duck is an eldritch abomination. If you want it can become a patron, but don’t make it that it’s a Dark creature polymorphed or trapped in the body of a Duck… make it that the Duck is its normal form.

Inspiration: The Duck above… wait I’ve gained inspiration from the duck of inspiration to make the duck of inspiration… it’s Duckception

Saw a post like this with negative outlook so I asked for it to be fixed

Puzzle Idea

Door of Dooring

Description: A heavy metal (❌🤘) door, without any inscription or mysterious entity guarding it, in a completely empty room. Oh and also without a handle or a key hole. The players can’t sense any sort of magic coming from it.

Functionality: It’s a one way door. The players must find a way to open it from the inside, like using daggers in the space between the door and the wall to pull it or with magic.

Inspiration: …I closed myself in a walk-in-freezer accidentally. For 30 minutes, which is probably less than how much time your players are gonna spend trying to understand what’s the deal with this door.