Experience Tumblr like never before
Teacher: I think it’s a reasonable assumption that none of you have ever been shot.
Peter: Umm...
Teacher: Apparently I was wrong. Peter, what the fuck?
Peter: Hehe. Funny story. *jumps out the window*
Ned: Pfft- He’s out of here
Teacher: Do you know how he got shot?
Ned: Uh... *nyooms out the door*
Peter talking to a tired Thor: So what’s Loki to you?
Thor: The reason I get up in the morning...
Peter: Really?! That’s cool
What Heimdall watched happen:
Loki: Hey...
Brother
Thor: *continues snoring*
Loki: Blergh *stabs him*
I never sleep cause of you
Ned: How come humans don’t lick to show affection?
MJ: Lesbians do
Peter coughing after choking on his saliva: W-what?!
MJ: You heard me
Ned dying of laughter and with an accent: It is what it is
Thor flirting: How’s the most wonderful person in the nine realms doing this fine morning?
Loki from the next room: I’m doing fucking great!
Jane who was with Thor: I was gonna turn that back on you but...
Heimdall watching everything: *sighs* Loki spends too much time watching TV shows from Midgard.
Peter our as Spider-Man talking to a criminal: Where can I find a wheelchair?
Criminal who’s rant was interrupted: What? Why?
Peter: Cause I can’t stand bullshit
Clint stuck in a chair: You may be asking “Clint, how did this happen? How did you do this to yourself?”
Natasha laughing to the side: Well kids, Clint has no clue either. He’s just fucking dumb.
Natasha pulling out a knife: Now let’s help this poor man.
Clint: *Indiscernible screaming*
Loki: Apparently spite isn’t a good answer to what motivates you.
Loki summoning daggers:
Where is it?!
Thor frantically trying to calm him down:
Loki, wait!! You should treat spiders how you wish to be treated!
Loki:
Killed without hesitation!
Thor:
Not again! Please stop dying!
Peter: Do you care if I take the skin off this Furby?
Peter: I want to make him a God. Once he is free of his sinful flesh, he can begin a path towards enlightenment. He will take care of Us.
Peter: I also want to softhack his circuits.
Tony: I literally could not care less but never say anything as frightening as that ever again.