Why Intercept?

Breton Wager

Breton didn’t usually walk this way after Math class ended. No, he decidedly didn’t walk this way, and he decidedly wasn’t supposed to.

“Darn,” he breathed. This was not going well at all.

Turning around, Breton tried walking the other way. No, that didn’t feel right either. If he turned to the left and went that way, he’d be back in Math class. That would end the whole thing right then and there. Going to the right would guarantee his progress into one of the Science classrooms.

Breton took a step towards the Science classroom. There was a buzz and a zip as everything resituated to his current standing point in time. Breton took a breath, closed his eyes, and began to walk forward.

After what felt like a good amount of steps to take towards a Science classroom, Breton stopped and opened his eyes. Ah, yes, this was indeed the Science classroom he knew and loved. There was Ms. Jennings. She was holding a paper out to the class, and the way her face was positioned seemed to indicate that this was a very important paper she had grasped before her. Oh, and look, there was Christian. Apparently he had Science first period. Go figure.

Breton took a step towards Christian. “Owgh!” he exclaimed as something painful happened to his head. Lifting his hand to the back of his skull, Breton felt a bruise forming. Shoot, what had he been doing a few seconds ago? Had it been dangerous? It certainly hurt, whatever it was.

Taking a look at Christian, Breton decided he should just return to Math class. Christian looked like he was about to say something to the person next to him, and Breton didn’t really want Christian to talk. The look on Christian’s face was not one of pleasure, and his usually neat blonde hair was sticking about. Both his hands we balled into fists, and one was poised above the table as if to pound it in the moments to come.

Breton turned and began to walk the other way, back towards the Math classroom. Eyes closed, of course. He began to pick up the pace, until he heard a small voice coming from over his shoulder.

“Breton! Hey, Breton!” it hissed. Breton stopped, opened his eyes, and turned. Coming down the hallway was Christian.

No, this wasn’t Christian, Breton decided. Not at all. What this looked like was the product that came from someone trying very hard to make a plush doll of Christian. They hadn’t failed, not necessarily. It was flying. That had been accomplished. Its long floppy arms caught the wind behind it as it moved.

“Breton!” spoke the Christian. It had floated very close now, and was only half a foot from Breton’s face.

“Hello . . . Christian,” Breton finally decided on words. “Are you . . . going to class?”

“No! I’m not going to class!” the Christian huffed, exasperated.

“Oh, you’re not. Yes,” Breton usually found himself at a loss for words, and talking to the Christian was no exception.

“I am getting rather fed up with you,” the Christian grumped, turning with a puff. “Which is ironic, isn’t it?”

“Isn’t it?” Breton asked, not entirely sure.

The Christian was suddenly very close, touching noses with Breton, the Christian’s long arms flopping onto his chest.

“I am you,” the Christian declared dramatically, and left.

Poor Margret

At first, Kennen didn’t know where he was. Then he remembered; sleepover with Esse at Nurse Moss’ house. Esse stood up and stretched. There were no need for beds in Nurse Moss’ house because the floor was so soft. Kennen pretended to be asleep. Esse changed and sat back on the floor. Checking the clock, Kennen had seen it was only 8:10. Nurse Moss woke at 9:30 on weekends. Suddenly Kennen realized: today was the day. This was Esse’s 13th birthday, or, her coronation of Assistant Secretary to Master Cameron and Mistress Amelia. Weasel Water Lou would be teaching her “the ways”. Even though work didn’t start until Wednesday, (and it was only saturday) Esse had been promised a private tour of the palace with Kennen. Kennen would be Esse’s assistant, making him the Assistant to the Assistant Secretary to Master Cameron and Mistress Amelia. Esse bounced over to Kennen to see if he was awake (you could bounce on Nurse Moss’ floor). “Kennen,” Esse whispered, poking Kennen’s wing. “Today is the day!”

“Hmm? What?” Kennen mumbled, opening his eyes and pretending to be tired. He honestly did want sleep. “I said today’s the day,” Esse repeated. “Now hop on my shoulder and we’ll go find Nurse Moss.”

“I can fly.” Kennen grumbled. Esse bounced out of the room, Kennen close behind her.

Flying into the kitchen, Kennen saw Nurse Moss preparing waffles. “Yummmmmmmmm.” Esse sighed. “Thanks, Nurse Moss.” Nurse Moss smiled. “Today’s the day!” she replied. “Hey, it’s my day too!” Kennen reminded her. “I know.” Nurse Moss said. “So I made you some seeds and berries. Raspberries, your favorite.” Kennen was awake now. With Kennen at the tabletop bird feeder, and Esse in her favorite cushiony chair, they munched their special breakfast. “Eat up!” Nurse Moss said to Kennen. “You’re too skinny!” Nurse Moss was always complaining about how skinny he was and NOT HOW PLUMP, MISS EVELYN FACE! His pale blue color made him look sort of sick. “You’ll want to hurry.” Nurse Moss said. “The tour starts in- goodness me! The clock stopped!”

“What!?” Esse cried, her fork clattering to the table.

“You have 20 minutes, so no walking.” Nurse Moss told them. “If we ask Doctor Lexie now, maybe we can borrow her MotorHuman360.” Doctor Lexie’s MotorHuman360 was not a human with a motor attached to it, nor a motor car that looked like a human. Doctor Lexie’s MotorHuman360 was simply a really fast guy named Niree who liked to say “vroom vroom.”.

“All right, let’s do it!” Esse said.

“Are you sure?” Kennen asked her. “You hate riding Niree.” Esse grimaced. “You told me that when you ride Niree, you feel too sorry for him, having to carry people around.” Kennen said.

“Well,” Esse considered. “We really should go now.” “Well then,” Nurse Moss said, standing up. “We better hurry before someone else asks.”

Soon, Kennen was flying behind Esse, who was on the back of a very pleased Niree, who loved talking to his riders. “How goes it, Miss If?” Niree said, using Esse’s nickname he gave her.

“Um, okay.” Esse gulped. Despite what Esse had told him, Kennen knew she was terrified. Because of Niree’s fast speed, Esse’s legs were flung out behind her, and she was clinging to Niree’s shoulders for dear life. Niree didn’t seem to notice anything that happened to his passengers. He couldn’t even really hear them. “Ah, yes, my grandmother lives there.” Niree responded. “We call her Grandma Lolch. Funny, isn’t it?”

“I, uh, yeah, um, okay.” Esse agreed. “Oh, yes, you’re right Miss If. That’s a great place to go camping. Grandma Lolch used to take me and R.A. there every winter.” Kennen sighed. Niree was nice, but kind of deaf.

Writing ship-able couples

Here are some tips for writing relationships your readers can get behind:

1. Give them reasons to click

The two characters must have things in common - a hobby, a philosophy, a background. There has to be some element that connects them.

Your readers will root for relationships in which the characters fit together better than they would with others.

Also, make their traits compatible. Have them share some characteristics or have their strengths and weaknesses be complementary. Is the one hotheaded? Maybe the other keeps their cool well in situations of conflict.

There are endless possibilities. Just make sure there’s a reason these two people like/love each other.

2. Have them be vulnerable in front of each other

Personally, this is the best way to get me to love a couple.

Have them share secrets, open up about their feelings and tell each other things they haven’t told anyone. Have them cry in front of each other and comfort each other.

This can be taken to a whole new level by having them understand the other’s emotions even without speaking and already offer comfort. Keep in mind that this will probably only be possible with long-established couples.

And having them open up is also a great way for them to discover all the things they have in common/love about each other.

3. Build up the tension

I cannot emphasise this enough: DO NOT MAKE YOUR COUPLES GET TOGETHER TOO QUICKLY.

One of the best elements of a romantic subplot (or even main plot) is the tension. Your readers want to see the pining! They want the build-up.

And no, I’m not saying that you should introduce endless, petty obstacles. That can become tedious and appear forced.

Just give your characters time to sort through their feelings. Make them fall in love slowly. Have them be unsure. Insert SOME obstacles/conflicts.

Have them almost kiss a few times. Not all the time. Too many almost-kisses can become frustrating. But you should throw a few in there.

And, if you feel comfortable with it, add some sexual tension. Have them notice each other’s bodies and imagine what they’d like to do to each other (that sounds more explicit than I intended :) )

4. Write a healthy relationship

This could just be me and my rejection of unhealthy romances, but I will not root for abusive relationships.

Have your characters be kind to each other, support each other and truly care for each other.

If your characters are constantly putting each other down, physically/emotionally abusing each other or going against the other’s wishes, they’re not in a healthy relationship.

A great way to write a healthy relationship whilst still maintaining the tension, is to have the conflict in the relationship be external. Instead of having the conflict be due to internal struggles between the two characters, have obstacles enter from outside.

Your readers should want them to be together and for that, they should be good for each other.

5. Have their friends/family see their chemistry

I find it beyond adorable when two characters are still figuring out their feelings for each other, but the fact that they’re perfect for each other is crystal clear to everyone around them.

Have their friends tease them about the relationship. Have family members ask after the them. Have their loved ones conspire to get them to admit their feelings.

If your other characters are rooting for them, your readers will probably do so as well.

Plus, this means that the chemistry between the two characters is so strong that it’s obvious, which is always good for an exciting romance.

That’s all I’ve got for now. If you have any further questions about writing OTPs or any other aspect of writing, feel free to message me or pop me an ask.

Reblog if you found any of this useful. Comment with your own tips. Follow me for similar content.

Rose Otterton

Illustration courtesy of Teepi Guest

Weasel Water Lou of the Peace in Carlos - 9

On Wednesday, Esse was so excited she woke up super early and woke Nurse Moss up too. “Hurry!” she kept saying. It seemed that Kennen had been doing the same. Esse and Nurse Moss met Kennen and Doctor Lexie in the lobby. “Let’s go!” Esse said. With Esse running close behind him, Kennen flew all the way to the palace. They were waiting in the jungle waiting-room when a girl about Esse’s age came in and sat down next to them. “Orderer Gemma!” Nurse Moss and Doctor Lexie said at the same time. Orderer Gemma smiled sheepishly and waved. “Hi, Nurse Moss. Hi, Doctor Lexie.” Orderer Gemma had messy orange hair pulled back in a messy ponytail. She was wearing the same blue outfit as Esse, with a blue vest over it. The blue vest had a few badges on it. Esse looked closer. One badge was for surviving a landslide. Orderer Gemma waved to Esse and Kennen. They waved back. Soon, a voice sounded through the room, “Orderer Gemma, your appointment with Teacher Yi is ready.” Orderer Gemma got to her feet. She turned once more to wave and smile sheepishly again before vanishing through a door. “I think we just met the princess.” Kennen whispered to Esse. Esse nodded. Orderer Gemma seemed to be a pretty nice princess. Soon, the same voice sounded through the room again. “Nurse Moss, Doctor Lexie, Esse and Kennen, your appointment with Weasel Water Lou is ready.” They walked through a door with the word SECRETARY etched into the wood. Opening it,they saw this: A small cocker spaniel sat at a wooden desk. A small dirt path led to the desk. Surrounding the path were trees and grass. “Hello.” said the cocker spaniel. “And how does my painting concern you?”

After Esse explained to Weasel Water Lou her whole adventure starting at her trip to the dental floss exhibit, Kennen repeated the part where Luc was taken away. Weasel Water Lou nodded. “Luc is no longer alive.” she said. “That is certain.” Esse nodded. She lowered her head. “I hoped…” Esse trailed off. Kennen landed gently on her shoulder. “As for your The Peace in Carlos being in danger, I will help you. You see, I once had a very good friend named Joe of the Braceland who I made that tapestry for. I would love to help all your people escape.” The next few days, Weasel Water Lou worked on the second tapestry, and Esse, Kennen, and Master Cameron worked out what to say to King Nnu, the ruler of The Peace in Carlos. “When I still lived there,” Weasel Water Lou said. “the ruler was Queen Asda.” Esse explained that Queen Asda was in the west part of The Peace in Carlos, solving their recent Carlosian invasion. Mistress Amelia was very helpful and so was Orderer Gemma. Orderer Gemma and Esse soon became very good friends. Kennen became friends with a boy named Ky, who was coming with them to talk to King Nnu. Everyone was very excited when Weasel Water Lou finally finished the second tapestry. It was time for Esse to go home.

Once in The Peace in Carlos, Esse led the new-comers toward King Nnu’s palace. “Let’s avoid everyone until later.” Master Cameron suggested. Everyone else agreed. “I have a secret way.” Esse announced. She led them through the woods where she first met Luc. They reached the end of the forest. They were in Ie Square. The big sign reading IE SQUARE stood tall above their heads. “We mustn't be seen!” Master Cameron hissed. Esse nodded. There were so many people in Ie Square. Disguises might be necessary. Kennen and Weasel Water Lou were already okay, but Master Cameron, Esse, orderer Gemma, and Ky had to get disguises. They all changed into olympic horse riding uniforms except for Orderer Gemma, who insisted on being a flight attendant. They blended in pretty easily. The olympic horse races were happening, and a plane had just crashed by Lake An. No one was hurt, but many flight attendants were milling about. When they reached the gates of King Nnu’s palace, right outside Ie Square, they tore off their disguises. They didn’t need them anymore. They entered easily, (King Nnu refused to have guards) and entered the throne room, where King Nnu and Queen Ly sat. “Your Majesty.” Esse cried. “We are in terrible danger!”King Nnu listened to the whole story from Esse, then Luc’s death from Kennen, and finally, all the rest from Master Cameron and Weasel Water Lou. “First.” said King Nnu in an orderly fashion. “I must inform Luc’s parents of Luc death. Kennen, would you mind coming?” Kennen said he would go. “Secondly,” King Nnu continued. “Esse, please go directly to you parents with Master Cameron. Weasel Water Lou, Ky, Orderer Gemma, please stay here and tell me of the place you come from.” So Esse and Master Cameron headed off.

“Esse!” cried Mrs. Iflandoonia. Esse was embraced with lots of crying. It felt so good to be back home. Even Elian was glad. Ty still thought Esse had been away at camp. Demitri,Sverre Jon, and Illtyd listened to the whole story of Esse’s travels, while Mr. and Mrs. Iflandoonia discussed things with Master Cameron. Soon, the whole town knew, and the escape from The Peace in Carlos was set for Friday, November 20th. Esse waited and waited. The day finally came.

The whole town was gathered in Ie Square. The large sign reading IE SQUARE was broken. Everyone had brought their belongings. Only nine at a time could enter the tapestry at once, not including luggage. It took five days to get everyone into The Meadow of Nimm. Esse and her family plus Kennen camped outside the vortex in The Meadow of Nimm to make sure everyone made it safely. There was a great search of The Peace in Carlos to make sure no one was left behind. But everyone was safe. No one was in danger in The Meadow of Nimm, with Ursula Kinns being gone. Weasel Water Lou verified that. She said that teleporting wasn’t very useful unless an emergency was occurring. You cannot control where you teleport to. All was well. Forever.

Poor Margret - 2

Esse and Kennen were two minutes early. They waited in the lobby. Kennen flew around the room, picking up falling stars that had fallen from the top of The Meadow of Nimm overnight. Esse created little constellations on the table. After a little while, Sir Anerapell, (directly translated meaning Sun Spirit Guy with the Moonish Nose) flounced into the room. He grinned at Kennen and Esse, his glowing blonde hair and crescent nose almost scaring them out of their wits. “I will be escorrrrting you through the palace!” Sir Anerapell told them in his squeaky high-pitched Decneleb accent. He grinned even wider. “O-kay.” Esse stammered. Kennen was too freaked out to say anything at all. A man came around from behind Sir Anerapell. “This is Sir Neeeeeek the sixtthhhhhhh.” Sir Anerapell hissed at them. (Directly translated, Nek means Great Life, but Lacking Creativity of Death) Sir Nek VI was an old, old, old, old, old, old man, having never died before. Sir Anerapell grinned again. “We shall now begin our tourrrr, shall weeee?” he prompted.

The tour was no fun for Kennen. He had to perch on Sir Anerapell’s finger, while he flounced and gestured wildly around the room. Kennen knew Esse wasn’t having fun either. She had a look of disgust and terror on her face, having been made to let Sir Nek VI escort her down the halls. Finally, they reached the room marked WEASEL WATER LOU, SECRETARY TO MASTER CAMERON AND MISTRESS AMELIA. Flouncing into the room, Sir Anerapell showed Esse the writing on door to the left of the room. On the door it read ESSE IFLANDOONIA, ASSISTANT SECRETARY TO MASTER CAMERON AND MISTRESS AMELIA. Esse’s office was quite nice. The walls were ice-like glass, as well as the floor and ceiling. Non-melting icicles hung from the ceiling. A snow-like rung lay across the floor. That was when something very strange happened. Sir Nek VI lifted Esse off her feet and dropped her on the snow-like rug. This was too much for Esse, who shuddered, rolled her eyes back in her head, and fainted. Kennen shuddered. Sir Anerapell grinned, flouncing toward the door marked KENNEN DAMANEL PASTAMAKER, ASSISTANT TO THE ASSISTANT SECRETARY TO MASTER CAMERON AND MISTRESS AMELIA. Opening the door, Kennen took in his new office. The white walls looked like a small child had scribbled on them, using lots of different colors. The ceiling was green, and had two eyes that were blinking down at Kennen. On the bright yellow floor was a red rug shaped like the letter R, on which Kennen was dropped. And then the tour guides were gone. This was the end of the tour.

Kennen rushed into Esse’s office. She was lying on the snow-rug, still unconscious. “Esse,” Kennen whispered, nudging Esse’s arm. “Wake up! They’re gone!” Esse moaned and rolled over. “Where am I?” Esse asked, sitting up.

“In your new office.” Kennen told her. Esse nodded. “Yeah, I was kind of, um, paralyzed with terror when Sir Nec-m VI brought me in here.” she explained. Kennen nodded. “I noticed.” he said.

“But, I guess we should be going now, so, let’s go.” Esse got up and strolled over to her desk. “Look at this.” she said, picking up a sheet of paper. Kennen flew over. “It’s a map.” he observed. “The tour guides must have dropped it.”

“Look!” Esse said, pointing at the map. “There’s Orderder Gemma’s room!” Kennen looked. In small letters, a sighed read ORDERER GEMMA ELIZABETH, 5TH DAUGHTER TO MASTER CAMERON AND MISTRESS AMELIA. “Let’s go say hello!” Esse said, dashing out of the room. “Wait!” Kennen called, flying after her. They went down many halls until they reached a door marked ROYAL RESIDENCE: IMPORTANT PERSONAL ONLY. “We’re important.” Esse said, pushing open the door and rushing in. “Not until Wednesday.” Kennen muttered, before following Esse.

Weasel Water Lou of the Peace in Carlos

After English next Tuesday, Esse had to sit next to Price on the hour-long bus ride to The Museum of Time and Space. She could hear Mies and We talking happily together. They were the only people on the bus enjoying themselves. Even the bus driver was grumpy. He was constantly telling them to “Be quiet, or you’ll never see those heads of yer’s again!”

When they reached the museum, a tall elderly man led them through the many exhibits, telling them all about Dental Floss. “Dental floss has been going on since prehistory, but in 1815, Dr. Levi Spear Parmly thought of using waxed silk threads to floss teeth!” the museum guide exclaimed with enthusiasm. Too much enthusiasm in Esse’s opinion.

He talked and talked and talked until they got to a pair of double doors with CLOSED FOR RENOVATION written on them. The guide was now bursting with excitement. So were Mies and We. “And here it is students!” the guide said. He threw open the doors. “The history of Dental Floss!” Mies and We oohed and aahed. After about two minutes of walking around, Price announced that he had to use the restroom. And just like that, he was gone.

Mies and We were in a corner, huddled around a photograph of some guy named Dr. Charles Bass. Esse walked into another room. This room contained dental facts, not all of them about flossing. There was a door at the end of the room that also said CLOSED FOR RENOVATION. Esse figured if she was already in an exhibit that was closed for renovation, she might as well go in this one.

The room was lit by a flickering light, coming from a lit chandelier hanging from the ceiling. All was quiet. No one was around. Not even Mies, We, or the guide could be heard from the other room. It seemed that the door Esse had come through was the only way to enter the room. Esse walked farther into the room. Every noise echoed.

There were no exhibits in this room. The floor was carpeted, unlike every other room in the museum, which was covered in hard tile. The walls were lined with wallpaper, instead of painted white. A plastic mat covered some of the floor beneath a tapestry with gold tassels hanging down the sides. Pick axes lay on the plastic mat, as well as hammers and a small bulldozer that fit in the room. The wall around the tapestry was chipped and cracked, as if someone had been trying to excavate around the tapestry. The museum obviously wanted the tapestry gone. Why?

Esse got a closer look. It was very old tapestry, with ancient writing at the top. There was a large multi-colored swirl to the left. To the right was what looked like dogs with waterfalls and lakes on their backs. It was fascinating. In the bottom righthand corner was the artist’s name:

Weasel Water Lou of The Peace in Carlos

It was truly very mysterious. Esse knocked on the wall. Hollow sounds echoed through the room. Was the tapestry a door? Who was Weasel Water Lou? Why was this tapestry in The Museum of Time and Space? Of course, Esse couldn’t spend forever in the little room. But when she walked out of the room, Esse saw something unfortunate.

Difgih was standing across the way from Esse. She was obviously partnerless. Her back was to Esse and she was reading something about dental floss for braces. Esse slowly tiptoed across the room into the one with FLOSS OF THE PRESENT. Hiding behind the biggest dental floss container in the world, Esse got a look at the clock. 4:37. That meant that the bus would come in thirteen minutes to pick them up and drop them off at home.

The bus ride from the museum was possibly less fun than the bus ride to the museum. When Price and Takahiro showed up at the bus late, they got in trouble for abandoning Esse and Difgih. So Price and Takahiro had to sit next to Mr. Oliverst and Esse and Difgih were “lucky” and got to sit in the back of the bus. Together. Esse looked out the window the whole time, and Difgih looked at the ground.

It wasn’t that Esse disliked Difgih, she was just afraid of her. Difgih had this weird telling-the-future thing she was always doing. And maybe Esse just didn’t want to know that she would meet a bear and go on a book worthy adventure. Maybe she just wanted to stay away from Difgih.

Esse got home at 6:43 p.m. Mrs. Iflandoonia was washing the dishes. “How was it?” she asked as Esse came in.

“It was good.” Esse answered. “Price abandoned me to go hang out with his friend. I sort of went around by myself. He had to sit with Mr. Oliverst on the ride back.”

“Aha!” Mr. Iflandoonia exclaimed. “I thought so! Price is no better than his father!”

“Luc!” Mrs. Iflandoonia said with her hands on her hips. “Really?!” Mr. Iflandoonia guiltily slinked away, probably harboring more thoughts on Price’s father. Mrs. Iflandoonia rolled her eyes. “I’ll talk with him later.” she said. “Well, Esse, how was it anyway?”

“I saw this exhibit on Dental Facts, and one of them had the biggest dental floss container in the world.” Esse answered. “But I have English homework, so, bye.”

Esse went up to her room to ponder the questions she had thought of earlier. But who could think with all that racket that Illtyd and Sverre Jon were making? She could hear them fighting over who would be Sidfig. “I’m the one who bought the book first!” Sverre Jon was yelling.

“I know that Esse has The Magical Powers of the Bonnet!” Illtyd yelled back. “That makes me a Verarlium Partosium, and you have nothing to do with it!”

Esse got out of bed and walked out the door. “Where are you going?” Mrs. Iflandoonia asked. She was trimming bushes. Why was she always everywhere she shouldn’t be? “I’m going for a walk.” Esse answered. And so she walked into the forest.

After about 1 ½ miles, Esse rested off the trail. It was so peaceful. Esse usually didn’t like quiet and peaceful. She normally liked things happening. But the forest was her favorite quiet spot. It was meant to only be the sounds of the birds and the deer and rabbits and foxes and… that strange noise from behind her. Esse turned around. There sat a little bear. Well, not little, this was a bear after all. If the bear stood on its hind legs, it would probably be as tall as Esse.

“Oh, hello.” she said. Then thought, Maybe I do hate Difgih. “Hi.” the bear answered back. The bear crawled over to rest next to Esse. “My name is Luc. Short for Lucjusz.” it said.

“My dad’s name is Lucjusz!” Esse said.

“Cool.” said Luc. “Do you want to be friends?”

“I guess.” Esse said. “Just because my dad and you share the same name? But, okay. I think bears are probably better friends than people.”

Luc nodded. “Oh yes, oh yes. We don’t hunt nixies for sport.” Esse smiled. “You’re much better than the kids in my class.” she said. Luc nodded.

“I always thought bears were better than nixies.” he said. Esse tilted her head. “Bears have never actually talked to me.” she commented. “But I think it’s because my brothers are too loud.”

“Oh, it’s not you.” Luc explained. “It’s, an, um, bear thing. We, uh, call it , um, Don’t Speak With Murderers. No offence.”

“Oh, it’s okay.” Esse said. “And you’re an adventurous bear?”

“Oh yes. I am the second bear to talk to a nixie and survive. Nobody knows yet though. The first nixie is you.” Luc answered. “I thought that that’s how I would die, but. . .I guess I die differently.”

“I guess we’re friends then.” Esse said, only a bit weirded out by the last part of Luc’s sentence. Luc nodded. It was decided.

The next day, Esse decided she was going to go see Luc again. If she found him again, she knew she would have made a friend. During school that day, Esse caught Difgih staring at her as if she knew. It was creepy.

Luc told Esse some interesting news. “Esse, you’ll never believe what I heard!” he said. “The Carlosians are closing in on the West Side of Peace, and they just took it over!” “Who are the Carlosians?” Esse asked. “You don’t know?” Luc asked, shocked. “The Carlosians are the people in the country that surrounds us. They are evil, and violent, and deadly, and they’re slowly taking over The Peace in Carlos! Only not so slowly anymore!”

“Wow!” Esse exclaimed. “I can’t believe I didn’t know that!”

“Neither can I.” Luc said. “I wonder who else doesn’t know. The problem is, not everyone has a hiding place, a secret den like my family does, and so they can’t always be safe when they need to be.” He shook his head in disapproval. “They’ll probably all die or something.”

“No!” Esse cried, “We can’t let that happen! What will we do?!”

“You and I can try to find a place for everyone.”

“Oh, yes. That’s a good idea,” Esse agreed, “Do you know any places?” Luc shook his head. Esse started to sigh, then paused, remembering the tapestry. “I might know a place!” she exclaimed with glee, “Yesterday I went to the new Dental Floss exhibit in The Museum of Time and Space, and I found a really mysterious tapestry by someone called Weasel Water Lou. There were pickaxes and bulldozers, and things like that near it. I bumped into the wall, and it was hollow! Also, the room looks like a room in a old house, not a museum room. There’s real carpeting and wallpaper! Maybe they’re making a hiding place for us! I wish I could show you.”

“That sounds nothing like my den, but okay, I’ll take your word for it.” Luc said. “I wish I could get to it.” After a moment, he exclaimed, “Hey! Are there windows near it? Maybe I could get in!” He sounded excited.

“Well…” Esse mused. “There’s a wall of all glass in the Dr. Levi Spear Parmly exhibit. Does that help?”

“Are there any windows that you can open?” Luc asked. “Oh, well, in the recreation of Johnson & Johnson, there’s a window. It might fit you, but I should probably measure it.” Esse answered.

“That would take too long.” Luc said. “Roughly how big was it?” Esse showed him with her hands. Luc just fit. “Good!” Luc said. “Is the Johnson & Johnson recreation on the first or second floor?”

“First floor, but the window is high. I’ll help you.” Esse volunteered.

“Good.” Luc nodded his approval. “See you tomorrow, Esse.”

“You too, Luc.” Esse waved goodbye.

Poor Margret - 5

Crabulul Iflanoonia worked in a small office with another girl named Nancyevelyn. Great-Uncle Crab glared at Esse as she walked through the door. Esse grinned at him. “Hello!” she said in a cheery voice. Crabulul began to growl. Esse shook her head sadly at him. “We are the police, and-” she began, but Crabulul cut her off. “You are not the police! You are that annoying childthat I see at family reunions!”

“Uh, huh. I see.” Esse turned to Kennen and whispered, “looks like we have a Code 5B2.” Kennen had no idea what this meant.

“Don’t you Code 5B2 me, missy!” Crabulul was shouting (actually, he was shouting a lot of other stuff as well that I will not repeat). As Crabulul continued shouting, (something about the police), and Esse was calmly pulling out from behind her back a paging device from who-knows-where, and all this was happening while Nancyevelyn slowly got up and told Crabulul, “Crabulul, steckte den Feuer-Blaster.” Uncle Crabulul sighed. From behind his back he pulled out a large hammer, and handed it to Nancyevelyn. Then he watched helplessly as Nancyevelyn handed it to a grinning Esse.

“What just happened?” Kennen asked as they walked back to the office. Esse grinned. “Well,” she began. “to begin with, I know Nancyevelyn because she is my 2nd cousin once removed and she’s a famous wizard. Code 5B2 means ‘angry relative wielding a fire blaster’, and so I took that pager from Nancyevelyn’s desk and paged Annaig to let him know we’re coming. Then, Nancyevelyn went up to Crabulul and told him to put down the fire blaster. She knows I’ll take good care of it.” Kennen just nodded. “How does it work?” he asked.

“Like this,” Esse said. She hit the ground with the hammer and flames shot out of the top. “This is our supplies” she said.

Annaig was amazed by the fire blaster, and agreed to get them a portal right away. “But what about your family Esse? And Nurse Moss?” Kennen asked. Esse shrugged. “We’ll only be gone for a little while anyway.” she told him. Annaig wrote a new message on the wall.

You have to jump into my eye.

“Okay…” Esse said. She jumped up on the desk and leaped into Annaig’s eye. Kennen flew in after her.

Esse Iflandoonia

Illustration courtesy of Teepi Guest

Breton Bauerbecken

Illustration courtesy of Teepi Guest