As An Introvert, HSP

I am choosing to be grateful,

For my body, my legs especially they are so strong and they work so hard, I am also grateful for the wind or breeze helps with the heat cause it’s so hot these days, I am grateful for ice cold water with little chunks of ice in it, I am grateful for my friends and how they cheer me up, I am grateful that my loved ones are okay, I am grateful for my hands, they helps us work and make delicious meals for ourselves, i an thankfull for my gut health, digesting all my food, I am grateful for love, from my family, lovers and friends, I grateful for comfort shows that keeps my breathe moving steadily, grateful for work that is exciting, grateful for the opportunities that come my way.

I am grateful

Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.

I am a sensitive soul and sometimes it understands on some level the struggle of others unspoken and there is an itch to help drag them out of the hole they can’t seem to come out from

But It also knows you can’t really drag another person out of their hole, only hope they get the strength to drag themselves out and letting them know, you are standing right at the exit holding out your hand

What hurts the most?

The denial within myself

The unveiling of the truth

The painting I drew that was a lie

The preparations to start again at the end

What really hurts the most is the disappointment

This might be an unpopular opinion but:

I'd rather start the romance all over again

I'd rather fix the problems

I‘d rather work on the triggers

I'd rather find out what went wrong

I‘d rather go through the hardships

I'd rather go through more fights and arguments

I'd rather go on more dates

I'd rather work on winning you over a million times

Than to start all over again with someone that won't be the same

Some scary things are worth doing. Going outside, talking to people, public speaking, trying out something new, getting a job even tho you're unsure how it will go. You're a scared little plant but you can blossom into a beautiful, self assured tulip if you try being brave.

On the floor of my room, curled up as far as my hips will allow, wondering if in a years time I would be in a different place were everything worked out, were everything came together so beautifully, so when I look back in my minds eye and I see my self on the floor of my room, trying to hold it all together, I might in that moment think of this moment as resilience

There are signs

That the tide is about to turn

That new things are coming

That there is a reward on the horizon

There are signs

That you are going to be okay

That this overwhelm you feel will pass

That you can handle it 

There are signs

That the universe smiles warmly on you

That your journey is beautiful

That it will all work out for you

There are signs

The scene at Osun Osogbo in Osun State, Nigeria by Adeolu Osibodu (@adeoluosibodu)